May 20th, 2025 - Love Letters

Hello dear reader! I was having a really good day, I was jamming out to Chloe Moriondo in the morning, trying to memorize her album before Friday. I drove to Cobs Bread to pick up some scones for a catering we had, doing paperwork I had overlooked in the parking lot. I spent the day making Palak Paneer and then serving customers, and went to the gym. The sky was a beautiful blue, the sun was giving a nice heat while the spring winds kept the temperature cool. It was a nice day. Then at the gym, Roy Kwan, a friend I hadn't realized I've known for two years now had me text a girl I hadn't spoken to in weeks. I had told him how I had a crush on her forever ago and how every now and then I think about what could have been. He ushered me to pursue because the worst she can say is "no" And I was actually feeling myself. I typed out the message and let him hit send. I took my shower after working out and he broke the news to me as he read the message that followed, She's taken. Maaaaannnnn. :c It's chill I don't even care actually. :( But she was really cool, and I wish I didn't fumble forever ago. I'm in a really weird place right now. I wasn't sad when I wasn't texting her, but now I know I shouldn't text her and that makes me sad?? I dunno. I wish them the best. I'm just bleafhgsdfkha I got a letter from my friend in Japan! Klarence! Yippie! Is it rude of me to be dissapointed with the size of the letter? LMFAOO, I love you Klarence so much. I miss you crazy style. Usually when he sends me stuff it's like 3 pages, today's was just a lil note. But it makes me smile. I love recieving letters, it reminds me that ppl love and care about me. Someone spent their time and money just to send me a lil message. It's nice. This has actually brightned my mood. Thank you Klarence. Bwoof-! It's 6:30. What should I do? I spent the evening cooking, texting Rajvir and watching Brooklyn 99. Closure. It’s just a fancy word for endings. I hate them both. Roy had called it in the gym. “This is closure.” The words were poison to my ears. My shoulders were heavy, my eyes were wet. I walked out of the room in silence. I didn’t play music on the way home. Music is a reflection of life and I didn’t want to think about that right now. I put a podcast on to drown out the sound of the wind brushing against my car.

It wasn’t until I got home that I came to terms with it being closure. I was explaining my feelings to my friend and he related it to an arc. A story arc I left open, a loose thread I refused to cut. I had finished the novel, I was done with the sweater. My eyes were wet again. I hate endings. But! My friend cemented it into my mind. This was a good thing. I had finally made space for other things. I no longer held a sliver of hope, an iota of doubt, I had my answer, and as lacklustre an ending as it was; the story was over. I could start a new one. So long, farewell. Auf Wiederseh'n, goodbye. To happier endings and new beginnings. - Dyl