May 12th, 2025 - AH Resurgence?

A dream that falls short of memory. Lucid in nature, like I could change the past.

Maybe my poor brain took pity on me, with all this talk of loneliness? I awoke today not to my alarm but a cat under my arm and a memory fresh in my mind. The familiar scene replayed in my head like a projector on a screen. It was nice. The cold however, I could do without. Entirely unwelcome.

Work was no obstacle today. It came and went as the ebb and flow of the tides. We interviewed a girl for a new position and that was the highlight.

I came home to a surprise however and that was entirely welcome. When I was 12, Roosterteeth had started their Lets Play Minecraft series. A staple of my childhood, a core memory. I wish I could say I stayed until the end, that I was there until it's dying breath but I aged out of them. I grew older and their content changed, both of us on seperate paths. Now that it’s all over, as everyone has gone their separate ways I find it comforting to watch those old videos, to return to a simpler time.

Growing up I moved schools frequently, the longest I stayed in any one area was 3 years and so I never kept many permanent friends. It wasn’t until Grade 7 and 8 that I made friendships that would last a lifetime. Even so, I had an Xbox, my friends had PlayStations and Discord had not yet been invented, crossplay was a pipe dream. I only spoke to my friends in person. So who did I turn to when I was alone? Who could I play with? I loaded up those Minecraft videos, I played whatever I wanted and it felt like they were in the room with me. Like I was a part of this group of friends. Eventually we grew distant but what a time it was.

I’m losing focus, the surprise I came home to was a video from two of the Achievement Hunters going around their old world and announcing a return to Minecraft. It feels nice for me. Last year and this one have been lonely and so to once more surround myself with familiar friends is a charity I am willing to take.

I’m glad you’re here. When I turned 25 I didn’t really have anyone to panic to. I’m so scared I’m an adult now. Is this the end of youth? Is that why my memories are flooding my head? Is my childhood dying and I’m becoming an adult? Is this how the doctor feels when he changes? I’ll still be me, but I'll be an entirely new me. All of the same memories with only half of the same feelings. I see it. Every second I am a different person, it is unavoidable. I caught myself being responsible and I nearly threw up. I remember how immature I used to be, I almost miss it. But this feels too large, such a grand scale. It feels like death, to grow. I hate it.

The rest of the night was spent cybering on my punk until I 2077’d. I’m 12 hours into the game now finally stating to grasp my bearings. It feels like a cyberpunk fallout 4.

Well, may your days be bright and your nights come with a nice breeze. I hope your downtime is calm and your days out are fun. Good night. - Dyl