August 18th, 2025 - Writing with nothing to say

I stayed up too late. They finally got to the Pain vs Naruto arc and I couldn’t keep my eyes off the screen. I let three episodes play past my bedtime. I wept as Kakashi gave himself up, as Choji’s dad, as Lady used everything she has to protect the villagers of the hidden lead, while Pain nuked the entire place. Shit is peak. Watching Naruto blitz these mfs is so cool. Big Ichigo coming back from the s-moon energy.

——-

I didn’t develop enough of a bond with Jen to miss her though her absence is certainly felt. Thinking of her; wishing her the best. The day passed easy. Thai Basil Beef and the greatest eggplant dish I’ve ever had the pleasure of making.

Roy confronted me today, it wasn’t anger but disappointment and befuddlement. I don’t think that’s worse, it’s probably better. There are very few things in this life that I regret, but my list of things I wish I did is long and many. That night is another notch, another thing I wish I did. If I wasn’t in my head I could’ve enjoyed my night. Next time, I promise you, next time.

It is especially gruelling when I tell you how much I want to live; and when the opportunity presents itself I pretend it doesn’t exist. I watch it pass me by and put it out of my mind. Only when I’ve missed it do I think so dearly of a life I haven’t lived. Next time.

At the gym I did one of those Japanese apologies where they fall to the floor. My arms are a little sore, I’ve been seriously slacking. It didn’t help that I was lulled in by the social part of social media. I kept texting my friends. It’s so fun!!! To talk!!! To people!!!!! What a joyous event.

——

I got home and only doom scrolled a little before heading to Canada post for stamps. I picked up a pizza on my way back and realized just how debilitating it is to have to pee. I couldn’t walk, or speak or- it is a special kind of pain to need to urinate. I ate my pizza and watched some YouTube videos. It’s almost time for bed.

When I was at work, the dungeon master in me wanted to claw its way out. It needed to work on material for the months to come. Now I sit at home idling by and he is dormant, sleeping. Were I not exhausted I think he’d be more than happy to write.

—— addendum

I kinda lost the evening.